Gingrich or Romney?

Here in New Hampshire, the place is lousy with presidential primary candidates. This being the Republican’s turn, I get to vote in about nine weeks for the one who can best crush Obama to a pulp. Sorry for the violent imagery, but it’s not my fault I have to wear a motorcycle helmet to the polls in case some New Black Panthers show up with nightsticks.

Anyway, like all true Americans, I’m an enormous fan of our two greatest William F.’s: Gibbons and Buckley. Billy Gibbons explained how to look for some tush: ask the Lord to take you downtown. Bill Buckley explained how to select the best Republican candidate: vote for the most electable conservative. Good advice from both of them; the trick, of course, is in the execution.

Given that Republicans often nominate the candidate who’s due his turn (Dole, McCain), Mitt Romney is the pre-approved front-runner this time around. Is Mitt electable? Absolutely. He’s smart, smooth and quick on his feet. He has a solid resume, significantly stronger than Obama’s. He can handle Obama one-on-one. Given Obama’s massive failures, the Romney camp will stockpile an ammo dump the size of Mt. Monadnock and Mitt will know how and when to drop the bombs.

So next question: is Mitt conservative? Lots of us aren’t so sure, hence the rise and fall of a succession of anti-Romneys: Bachmann, until she said one too many stupid things; Perry, until he did one too many stupid things; Cain, until the Axelrod crew took him down a peg with bimbo eruptions (plus he said one too many stupid things). Now it’s Gingrich. Smart guy, but why would he trash the Ryan budget plan and why would he sit down with Phyllis Diller Nancy Pelosi to do a global-warming ad? In the back of my mind, I’m thinking Gingrich has a screw loose, and if he’s the Republican candidate it’ll unscrew at the worst possible moment and then it’s bye-bye USA. Plus his name is “Newt Gingrich” — not exactly John Quincy Adams — and he looks like the Pillsbury Dough Boy’s great uncle. I’m not saying voters are shallow, but come on, voters are shallow. Gingrich, despite his intellect, isn’t the most electable.

So back to Romney, still the likely nominee. What? Who did I forget? Oh, Ron Paul. Look, we all appreciate the libertarian ethos, but the country should not and will not elect somebody who thinks it’s our fault we got attacked on 9/11. End of discussion.

So back to Romney. Everyone points to Romneycare as the biggest red flag, but Mitt is fully aware he has to sink Obamacare, and he will. I have a bigger problem with Romney claiming to be an AGW adherent. While I suspect he knows AGW is a scam, his eagerness to suck up to the lowest common denominator is evidence he’ll say whatever he thinks he has to to get elected. Very disappointing. But I’m betting Romney will govern as a solid conservative, because the times demand it and he knows it. He knows voters aren’t going to sign up for more crash-and-burn doctrinaire liberalism. He knows we’re disgusted with the utter failure of reckless stimulus spending, mind-boggling deficits, the explosion in $100k+ government salaries, the death-grip of public employee unions on our wallets, a justice department thoroughly out of control, political kickbacks under the guise of loan guarantees for green-technology BS and the fact that Obama’s congressional leadership is incapable of even proposing a budget. Romney is no liberal. He understands business and he understands the proper role of government — and certainly a hell of a lot better than any Democrat on the planet. Romney can and should beat Obama.

Obama, of course, is ripe for a take-down. Never mind his putrid record — Obama’s way overrated as a candidate. Remember, in ’08 he ran against a little old man in a horrible economy, with two unpopular wars dragging on and $4.00 gas — all with the media blowing a hurricane wind at his back. He should have won by 12%, but managed only a 7% win over McCain.

While still thoroughly in the tank for Obama, the national news media will first play it a bit sneakier than they did in ’08. They’ll drum up the Mormon thing using the “some say” technique. Guaranteed, you’ll see this story about 4,000 times on Good Morning America, NBC News, the Boston Globe, the New York Times, Politico, NPR, CBS, ABC, CNN, the Chicago Sun-Times, the LA Times and on and on and on — not to mention Class-A moron media like The View, Huffington Post, Time, Newsweek, Piers Morgan and MSNBC:

Some say there’s a big split brewing among conservative voters because some say the Christian right is distrustful of Mormons. Some say Mormons believe and do all kinds of weird things. Some say all these religion-y types like Romney are scary so you should vote for Obama. Plus some say Mormons were racists, so you should vote for Obama. That’s why some say you should vote for Obama, because you should vote for Obama. Back to you, Anderson.

But Obama will consistently trail Romney in the polls, and the liberal-media complex will flip out like a BRAVO housewife on bad meth. They’ll go full-tilt, all-out bat-poop insane. They’ll swab Obama’s butt with their faces 24/7 (and they’ll like it). It’ll be the ugliest presidential campaign in our lifetimes. Romney has the demeanor and the smarts to rise above it. Hopefully.

---